I recently part-exchanged my 2014 535d M Sport for a brand-new Range Rover Sport Autobiography… and, oh dear, how I miss my 5 Series. So much so, in fact, that I was originally trying to buy it back and reverse the deal. The dealer wanted an extra £5000 from me for less than a week’s worth of driving the Range Rover. Initially I said no, but decided I missed my car so much I really had no choice. So I agreed but then, the day before we was supposed to change back, the dealer called and told me it wanted a further £2800 as that is what Land Rover had contributed to the deal. At this stage I had to wave goodbye to my Five.
The thing is, I have always wanted the latest version of the Range Rover Sport and always said if I ever had the money I would get one. They look just as great outside the Savoy as they do mudplugging… but within seconds of driving it I knew I had made an £80,000 mistake. I did test-drive one before purchase but it was a slightly different model that seemed to be a better drive than mine. My car is not all that smooth on its Scorpion Verde tyres but there’s a very limited choice of tyres that will fit this thing. These are so called ‘green’ tyres and are a bit lumpy – almost like a winter tyre.
Everything in this car, including its version of Head-Up display (HUD) is such poor quality and slow it’s like going back to 2003 when BMW brought HUD to the masses. As for the headlights, well they are certainly not in the same league as the LED items that I had fitted on my 535d. Nor is the so-called excellent Meridian 900w stereo. It’s great at high volume but when on low it’s rubbish. Not a patch on the Harman Kardon in the F10. God I miss my car. Anyone who thinks Range Rovers are the best are mistaken – they are far from it. Yes, they are superb inside and may go up and down muddy hills but on road I’d say they are nothing special at all. I would rather be in an X5 with all that luscious gadgetry and power. My only complaint with current BMWs is that I don’t like the way they look.
Oh, and one more thing: we take for granted how fantastically BMW technology works and how seamless it all is, especially when being able to use the iDrive when driving. But with the clunky slow touch-screen on the Range Rover trying to change my iPod music while driving is bloomin’ dangerous. Touch-screens in cars should be banned! They do not work well and are not safe.
Anyway, someone somewhere will be the luckiest person alive when my BMW 535d goes through an auction with its 24,000 miles and almost £20k of extras. Now I am stuck with this Goliath of a machine for four years when I will then be free to move back to my family at BMW. God it’s going to be a long four years… let’s hope it snows continually so that least I’ll get some use out of the Range Rover!
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